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I messed up really badly. More so than I ever had in my life. I lost all my crypto and fiat funds, and have no one to blame but myself. Throughout the entire bear market of 2018, I’ve been collecting as much BTC and ETH as I could. I fully believed in the tech, as well as the opportunity for financial freedom that was presented in front of me. I used the money from part time jobs (while studying at university full time) and a large portion of my student loans to buy crypto every month. Even as the bear market diminished the value of my portfolio, I kept on buying knowing that it would potentially pay off one day. I was in my last year of university and my thinking was that crypto at the very least could help me pay off my student loans. And for the past couple of months, everything seemed to be going according to plan. Crypto was booming literally just in time for my graduation.
That’s when I discovered Bitmex.
In one month, Bitmex managed to ruin my life. I started off with a small deposit of 0.01 BTC, and I managed to flip that in to 0.2 BTC within a week. I was euphoric. Then as quickly as I made it, I lost it all to one swift move by the market. So I made a new account thinking that I knew what I was doing this time around and deposited a slightly larger amount. Liquidated. I deposited again. Liquidated. It got to the point where my bank account had no money left to fund my Bitmex account and that’s where I made my biggest mistake. I decided to “borrow” funds from my BTC and ETH cold storage to try to recuperate everything I’ve lost so far on Bitmex. And as I now know, revenge trading never works. Today marked the end of my crypto career, all my alts were liquidated when BTC broke 9k and pretty much dumped right after.
I have now no more funds left to deposit and have lost all my crypto. Everything that I’ve been collecting during the bear market, just to have it taken away right before the bull market. I’ve lost a total of 1BTC worth of crypto, which may not seem like that much to some of you, but that was literally everything that I had. I have nothing left now. I can’t find someone to hire me with my god-damn useless degree. I have no way of paying off my student loans. I feel stuck. I feel scared. I feel angry that I screwed myself this hard. I’m absolutely freaking out right now as I’m typing this and I’m having thoughts of killing myself… because I really don’t think I can recover from this. I don’t know what to do.
If there’s anything that anyone can take away from this, it’s to not mess around with margin trading and leverage unless you really know what you’re doing. It’ll be the death of you. Literally.